Moonfall review: Roland Emmerich’s disaster movie is like Halo, but worse

It’s better for all of us if I spoil Roland Emmerich’s big silly action movie MoonfallHere, right at the beginning. It isn’t an act of spite. It was something I wanted to do. MoonfallIt is worth watching, I think. But here’s the problem: Moonfall barely delivers on the trailer’s promise of a throwback disaster movie from the one-time king of the genre. It also crumbles in its third act when it turns into a bizarre science fiction spectacle. Its pivot is one of the best things about it. Moonfall — an inexplicable choice that leads to unintentional hilarity and a world of missed opportunity. It could have been the film that gave us the Moon. Instead, it offers the world’s noisiest lullaby.

Let’s see what you get. Moonfall pretends to be: a film about the Moon falling out of orbit, wreaking havoc on Earth’s ecology and spurring catastrophic destruction on a global scale. It’s the sort of thing that prompts a last-ditch mission for a ragtag crew of astronauts, who must rocket off to stop the Moon somehow.

Let’s see what you get. Moonfall It is. (Spoilers ahead. Seriously.) It’s a science fiction film about how the Moon is actually hollow, a vessel from our interstellar ancestors, which is under assault by an alien threat in the form of a sentient cloud of nanoparticles. Earth is caught between the artificial intelligence and Moon, the remaining remnants from an interstellar conflict.

Lionsgate Image

Emmerich is known as the greatest disaster-movie kings of all time. His fame was due to movies such as Independence Day Tomorrow is Tomorrow, It has been largely abandoned as the domain of superhero films, while cinematic destruction is gaining popularity. Moonfall is a throwback to that sort of spectacle, but it’s one that makes a terrible case for the genre’s return. It’s a shame because MoonfallThis is an amazing title/premise combination, cinematic cheese that will make blockbuster-lovers swoon at its sheer lunacy.

Moonfall follows a familiar formula. An overlooked quack — this time, K.C. HousemanGame of Thrones’ John Bradley), a conspiracy theorist who works as a janitor at a research university — suspects something is wrong with the Moon’s orbit. Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson), a disgraced astronaut, is now in the background. Learn moreThe Moon is experiencing some problems after an unsuccessful mission. However, the authorities are unwilling to believe the Moon and start to blame him. The Moon becomes apparent that he is indeed a rogue. Take off, K.C. To encourage NASA to take action, K.C. The only ones left to save our planet from a dire situation are K.C. (Brian) and Jo Fowler (Halle Berry), who launched a desperate but ill-advised mission towards the Moon.

But Moonfall’s script buries its lede, committing the storyteller’s sin of not opening with the most interesting stuff first. Instead, the film spends its first half on Brian’s fractured family, his troubled son, his wife’s asshole new husband, that sort of thing. These digressions continue to be a distraction throughout, as Harper’s family is the Earthbound half of Moonfall, the eyes through which we see the tides overwhelm dry land and skyscrapers uprooted by the Moon’s gravity. Unfortunately for the audience, the devastation is only a small part of the cast’s struggle. Many of their problems are less important than alien shenanigans, such as thieves or avalanches. And The cast’s performances — even from Wilson, who always fully commits to his roles — cannot make much of a script that feels algorithmic.

Photo: Reiner Bajo/Lionsgate

This kind of drudgery is more or less expected in an Emmerich film, and it’s tolerable if there are some good fireworks in store in the latter half of the film, where the “disaster” part of “disaster movie” becomes the star. Moonfall fumbles this mechanic, both on Earth — as great moments of wonky Inception-style physics are passed over far too quickly, and the dread of a giant Moon on the horizon never feels real — and in outer space, when K.C., Brian, and Jo finally get inside the Moon and learn it’s a spaceship under assault from a malevolent artificial intelligence.

The bananas’ revelation cannot be understated. Someone hearing this premise described at a bar might think “Oh, that’s kinda cool.” You know what else? You know what? It is kinda cool. As a premise, “the Moon is hollow” is within spitting distance of “the Moon is haunted,” a top 10 setup if there ever was one. What is the connotation of that thought? It’s all much more interesting than Moonfall. You can play video games instead. One of the most popular movies is Fucked Up Moons. Consider:

Film critics often refer to video games as analogies in an insulting way. This is because they are trying to describe a film that values special effects more than stakes. MoonfallHowever, it might have been even more enjoyable if Continue reading like a video game, ditching most of the human cast that drags the film down, and focusing on its ragtag crew on a Moon that’s stranger than we expected. Actually, it’s actually quite possible to make a movie about if. MoonfallEach character was replaced by Halo’s Master Chief, it might have been easier to get behind.

MoonfallOn February 3, debuts in cinemas