Lyle Lyle Crocodile review: Javier Bardem, WTF

An initial glance may not be so clear. Lyle and Lyle, Crocodile looks like another overblown adaptation of a beloved children’s book. It’s got a more “realistic” but still cartoonish CG rendering of a classic character (like Peter RabbitOr Clifford the Big Red Dog); a setting in storybook — which is to say, vaguely Canadian-looking — New York City (also like Clifford); and egregious celebrity voice casting (featuring Shawn Mendes as Lyle!).

While the majority of the cast are more traditional and diverse than others, they have a higher quality. Constance Wu is the parent of the young hero, and she has been in two hit movies with it. HustlersAnd Crazy Rich AsiansAnd Scoot McNairy, the amazing character actor. Moreover, LyleJavier Bardem, quadruple Oscar nominee and one-time winner, has been featured in a prominent role. This character is a forbidding role that demands the uncompromising star of There is no country for old menAnd SkyfallSuspenders are worn, smoke bombs can be thrown, and soft-shoe with a CG croc is practiced. What’s going on here?

It’s not that unusual for a major star to log time in a movie for kids, especially when they have younger children of their own, as Bardem does. For that matter, the role of Hector P. Valenti, a gregarious wannabe “star of stage and screen” per his business card, who discovers the singing-not-speaking crocodile Lyle in a rundown pet shop, shares some common ground with Bardem’s recent turn as a charming-yet-caddish Desi Arnaz in Being the Ricardos. Both are entertainers born, capable of instilling suspicion and trust. Under normal circumstances, Bardem’s appearance here would probably make some kind of sense. However, this version Lyle and Lyle, CrocodileThese are not typical circumstances.

Photo: Fernando Decillis/Sony Pictures

It is, in some respects, a good thing. The movie does not pervert Bernard Waber’s series of picture books about the apartment-dwelling Lyle; there aren’t many transparent attempts to curry the favor of contemporary kids. Lyle doesn’t dab, or get into FortniteHis lack of dialogue is an advantage. Even the film’s most modern elements — the presence of superstar vocalist Mendes, crooning a series of syrupy pop numbers curated by songwriters du jour Benj Pasek and Justin Paul (Dear Evan Hansen, The Greatest Showman) — speak to a desire to make something resembling an old-fashioned musical. There are only five musical numbers. It is possible that there should be more. This movie tells the story of Josh, who is anxious and has to adapt to life in his new hometown with Lyle (who suffers from stage fear).

Yet Lyle and Lyle, Crocodile This is surprising for a movie that focuses on the innocent antics and sweet nature of a child, as well as a singing crocodile. Bardem is the central figure of the confusion, as he plays an import character from the books. The film begins with what is essentially a remake of the classic Looney Tunes short “One Froggy Evening,” only played for pathos instead of laughs. Valenti can be seen first flimflaming his way to an audition for a show that had already rejected him. He’s obviously desperate for some kind of showbiz success, so when he discovers Lyle, he sees a ticket to the big time. Bardem instructs the young croc to dance an intricate song and dance number. Lyle and Bardem perform it with much enthusiasm. Lyle then rents a theater for performances. Lyle gets nervous and goes silent, just like that maddening cartoon frog, leading to Valenti’s financial ruin. Lyle then sets off on a road trip to make some extra money and pay his bills. Josh discovers Lyle and takes him to Manhattan.

Photo by Sarah Shatz/Sony Pictures

However, when Valenti goes back to his Crocodile, it becomes strangely murky. This character is a whimsical dreamer. His outlandish outfits and instant acceptance of a singing-but-not-speaking crocodile suggest so. Yet he’s also framed as a hustler and a charlatan, hoping to exploit Lyle for fame and fortune. One scene in the movie shows him selling Lyle to another person and then ratting him out to animal control. It seems like he is trying to get something for himself and not for Lyle. Later, after redeeming himself, he also makes reference to being Lyle’s manager, despite seeming like a guy who craves the stage, not behind-the-scenes wheeling and dealing. (I thought my confusion might have been old-man brain-fog, but a 6-year-old consultant who watched the movie with me confirmed that Valenti’s motivations made little sense.) Or is he a mere agent for chaos? Does this man really feel unwell?

Bardem does his best to roll with the punches, perhaps hoping that if he keeps things moving for long enough, if he throws enough smoke bombs and dances with enough zeal, he will discover an actual character arc, even if it’s a silly one. The movie’s best moments are summed up by his honest, scattered performance. Lyle and Lyle, Crocodile feels like it’s been rewritten and reworked into incoherence; it’s a movie that never gets a handle on the problems its humans are supposed to be solving, and comes alive mainly when its characters are singing and dancing. It takes Javier Bardem’s admirable willingness to cavort around in a top hat after a career full of heavier roles, and turns it into a needlessly convoluted WTF.