Elden Ring turned me into the bully

I’ve had it with these jerks.

It was my first try at Elden Ring It didn’t go as planned. My valiant efforts to chip away at any opponent’s health felt like a toothpick poking a cinder block. Hemorrhage weapons and power stancing were helpful, too. However, I was able to save my skin and teeth. Margit, Godrick and Grave Warden Duelist weren’t very nice to me. Please feel I was tossed about in my respective arenas by their delight. Even though I did eventually win, the victories were not significant.

Now, I’ve had six weeks away from the open-world epic. Before I could beat Rennala, I decided to play as John Wick. Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands. What was my return to? Elden Ring, I restarted completely. I could have respecced with the Queen of the Full Moon’s help, but something about a fresh start seemed more appealing. This world was my dream, in all its magnificence. I didn’t want to clench my teeth every step.

When I decided to return to my original role as Vagabond, nostalgia kicked in and took me back in time to the very first day I awoke. Dark Souls’ Northern Undead Asylum before finding a sword and shield with which to batter the zombie horde. Elden Ring’s heartiest starting class gave me an early edge in the Vigor department, and its Strength stat (second only to the Warrior class) meant I could pummel foes from the outset. I could also withstand — or at least mitigate — the vast majority of enemy attacks. The world was open to me by the time I reached it. block, counterattack, stun lock Already muscle memory was rushing back.

Image by FromSoftware/Bandai Namco via Polygon

I shield-bashed across the Weeping Peninsula. Leonine Misbegotten got beaten to death. I one-shot Margit with the help of my Lone Wolf Ashes and my watermelon triceps, and blocked each of Godrick’s attacks before circling around to give him an atomic wedgie with my Omen Cleaver. As he fell to the ground, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief and a feeling of regret. Bullying the bully had made me hate myself, so I became the bully.

Here at Polygon, we’ve lauded Elden Ring’s flexibility several times over. We’ve also praised Elden Ring’s willingness You can find more information here Encourage flexibility. Much of FromSoftware’s catalog has already done this to some extent, but The Lands Between is so packed with magical armor, mysterious armaments, and helpful NPCs that there are numerous ways to mount every hurdle. Elden Ring is not only the newest in a legacy of games that act as crucibles to test your character builds, but also that legacy’s most approachable incarnation.

My first playthrough was not a success. But this time around, I’ve created a character that doesn’t put up with Shit!. Runebear could only nick my stamina bar, and Radagon’s Red Wolf couldn’t interrupt a single swipe of my Grafted Blade Greatsword. I’m the one tossing these would-be bullies around now. I’m making these jerks look like dorks. The second act is what I’m doing with my new playthrough. For the mean girlsThe Bullied Cady Heron fights Regina George, only to be made a bully by herself.

My difference is that I won’t get down from my perch. I’m the Matt Wilson to Margit’s Encino Man. I am the Vice Principal Vernon to Royal Knight Loretta’s Breakfast Club. Tony Perkis is my name, Rennala is the name of a group of teenage boys. I’ve become the bully and it’s served me well, and a dark part of me now understands the allure of punching down in FromSoft’s cruel world. Here, Johnny Lawrence will Always sweep Danny LaRusso’s legs. In The Lands Between, O’Doyle will always rule.