The most ridiculous moments from the ’90s Legend of Zelda comic

Link saved Hyrule before a mysterious spreading of rot and other malvolence. Tears of the Kingdom: The Legend of ZeldaHe was assigned a far simpler task: Kiss Zelda.

Polygon has announced a Zeldathon for 2023. Begin our adventure through The Legend of Zelda’s entire series from the original 1986 title to the release of The Legend of Zelda Tears of the Kingdom.

You don’t remember that part from the games? That’s because it’s not part of any of Nintendo’s oeuvre. Kissing Zelda was Link’s driving force in DiC Entertainment’s 1980s cartoon Legend of Zelda, and it was used again for a comic book from Valiant Comics in the early ’90s — well before Nintendo started to get much stricter about how its franchises were portrayed.

American networks of the time looked for ways to make cartoons. Nintendo’s properties were primed for that: Games such as Legend of Zelda Zelda II: The Adventure of Link have storylines, but they’re relatively simple in both graphics and narrative. This means that there is a lot to do and many plot points to develop, but it will end (hopefully!) with a kiss.

Link asking Zelda to kiss her, and she says no. From the Legend of Zelda comic book,

Image: George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

The Legend of Zelda comic book is just one part of Valiant’s Nintendo Comics System collection, which had comics based on Super Mario Bros. And Captain N, The Game MasterA cartoon that combined different Nintendo characters. Like the cartoon created by DiC, Valiant’s Legend of Zelda was much wackier than the franchise we know today — Link, Zelda, and a new fairy called Miff were up to a ton of hijinks. We have selected our favourite bizarre moments from this short run.

Hyrule Uprising

A page from The Legend of Zelda comic book. Ganon convinces villagers he’s good, actually, and that Link and Zelda are the evil ones. He commands the villagers to capture Link and Zelda.

Image by George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

In “Trust Me,” the second story in Legend of Zelda’s second issue (it has two stories, as do the rest of the issues), Ganon visits the town of Saria (a location introduced in The Adventure of LinkNot to be confused or misunderstood with the character Ocarina of time) to talk shit about the franchise’s iconic duo. The town quickly recognizes the shadowy, hooded figure as the prince of darkness; Ganon snatches up a little boy and sits him on his knee to evade suspicion, and then convinces the village that Link’s actually the malevolent villain. He points over the village’s barren land and asks: Was Zelda or Link able to assist you in this situation? Touché, Ganon. He uses his magic to sprout up an apple tree in an attempt to bribe the villagers — and it works. The villagers try to run Zelda and Link off, and when they don’t leave, Ganon convinces the angry mob to capture them. The little boy hesitates to hand over the Master Sword that Link had dropped, and Ganon turns on him — and the boy ends up saved by Zelda. We discover that Link and Team Zelda switch the town back to Link. didYou can help by helping the town build a dam to divert the water to the farms. It’s the dam that breaks and ends up washing Ganon away.

Link transforms into Ganon

Link throwing the Triforce into a well because his face turned into Ganon’s

Image: George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

The third, two-part issue features Link and Zelda grabbing the Triforce of Power. This adds to Zelda’s Triforce of Wisdom. Link is slowly corrupted and becomes a horrible version of Ganon with pig faces and all. A group of animals agree to serve Link, the Triforce of Power holder. When Link attacks Zelda to get the Triforce of Wisdom, the Triforce of Courage transfers from Link’s heart to hers, protecting her from the spell. Link sees his reflection and realizes he’s got Ganon’s face, he throws the Triforce of Power down a well. Goodbye!

Zelda also randomly stated that she loved Link in spite of all the chaos.

Parental punch

A page from The Legend of Zelda. Link shows up at his parent’s home and gets punched by his dad.

Image: George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

Legend of Zelda’s fifth issue opens with a thud, as Link journeys home to Calatia to visit his parents.

Before we proceed, let me take a moment to pause. Catalia isn’t mentioned anywhere in the games, and Link’s parents have been absent entirely, aside from a few brief mentions in Ocarina of time. It’s a shocker to look back at these comics to see Link’s father (Arn) punching Link in the face immediately upon returning home — You’re no son of mine! Harsh.

Reading on, you’ll find out there It is a reason: An evil guy working for Ganon disguised himself as Link and took Catalia’s queen hostage. Everyone in Link’s hometown, including his parents, thinks he’s gone evil. All of them eventually realize the trick and Link is able to rescue the day once again. Here’s the twist: Link is challenged by evil Link to fight for his life. (He’s also mysteriously missing his Triforce, but more on that below.) Link is the winner, naturally.

Triforce Day

Zelda on a roof top holding a bow and shooting at enemies in The Legend of Zelda comic book

Image by George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

The second storyline in the fifth issue is called “The Day of the Triforce,” outlining the one day of the year where all three Triforces disappear for the day. What do they do? They go to the beach for margaritas. That last sentence was my own invention. There’s no explanation for the event, or where the Triforces go.)

This coincides with why Link must fight to the death, without any Triforce support. The queen, held hostage in the last issue, chooses Link to be her champion in a battle with fake Link — and they’ve got to fight until one remains. The story is more than just a convenient one. Where’s Zelda? A healer from the aforementioned Saria comes looking for Link to save her city, but Link’s not there. (See above.) Zelda heads to Saria in his stead, also without her Triforce powers, to save the city — and she does. After sniping the bad guys, she posts herself on a wall before attacking Ganon.

Consumer tips

You will find short comics near the end of every chapter. The Legend of Zeldaentirely new and different than the one that was being told. They’re bizarre and have no context, the most amusing of which is a fake advertisement for the Hyrule Better Business Bureau. Take a guarantee!

A page from The Legend of Zelda comic book called “Zelda’s consumer tips.”

Image by George Caragonne/Valiant Comics

If we’ve piqued your interest, you can read the rest of Legend of Zelda comic books (and Valiant’s other Nintendo comics) on Archive.org.

#ridiculous #moments #90s #Legend #Zelda #comic