Fullmetal Alchemist, Animal Crossing, and Hunter x Hunter song parody lyrics

I don’t have my own memories of summer camp, but I do have fond memories of the three-volume set of camp song CDs my mom bought for me and my siblings because she thought we were missing out on a fundamental American experience. These songs have become so deeply ingrained in my brain, for whatever reason, that I can recall their lyrics and then burst into an energetic campfire song without any prompting.

But some of those lyrics are boring and outdated — how the hell do you fix a bucket with a straw, Liza? Clementine stepped on a mine! John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt is actually who?

Itre’s no time like the present for a campfire song rewrite, so I’ve taken a few of my favorites and given them some Very Polygon makeovers based on things that we here love to watch, play, read, and write about.

“There’s a Hole in My Arm”

The Fullmetal Alchemist version of “There’s a Hole in My Bucket”

Image: Bones/Aniplex

There’s a hole in my arm, dear Winry, dear Winry

There’s a hole in my arm, dear Winry, a hole

It will be fixed, Edward dear Edward.

It will be fixed, Edward dear, Edward!

How can I make it right, Winry dear Winry

Dear Winry, what will I use to fix it?

For metal dear Edward, dear Edward.

Metal, Dear Edward, dear Edward.

The metal’s too big, dear Winry, dear Winry

The metal’s too big, dear Winry, too big

It should be cut, Edward, Edward, Edward

It should be cut, Edward dear Edward

Dear Winry, how shall I make it?

It’s a delicate thing, Winry. How do I get it to be cut?

A hacksaw is used to make Edward, Edward, Edward, Edward

A hacksaw dear Edward dear Edward

The hacksaw’s too dull, dear Winry, dear Winry

The hacksaw’s too dull, dear Winry, too dull

Sharpen it dear Edward.

Next, make it sharpen Edward dear Edward. Make it sharpen Edward!

How shall it be sharpened, sweet Winry, dear Winry

What shall I use to sharpen it dear Winry?

A stone for Edward dear Edward dear Edward

A stone for Edward dear Edward

Dear Winry, the stone is out

Winry, the stone is out

Bring it in, Edward dear.

Take it inside, Edward.

What will you do, Winry?

It is dear Winry. How will you carry it?

Your arm dear Edward.

Dear Edward, with your arm

But there’s a hole in my arm, dear Winry, dear Winry

Itre’s a hole in my arm, dear Winry, a hole!

“Home, Sweet Island Home”

The Animal Crossing New Horizons version of “Home on the Range”

O, please give me a house where the seabass can wander

Play and frolic in the village

Isabelle, always ready to assist wherever you are.

Tom Nook takes your loans now

Home is a sweet, island-like home

Play and frolic in the village

Isabelle, always ready to assist wherever you are.

Tom Nook takes your loans now

“My Name is Spike Spiegel”

It Cowboy Bebop version of “My Name is Yon Yonson”

Image: Sunrise/Crunchyroll

My name is Spike Spiegel

My ship, the Bebop

My job is bounty hunter

The people who hunt with me say it when I draw out my gun

You want to make a deal with me?

Ich sage,

My name is Spike Spiegel…

It My Immortal version of “John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt”

Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way, her name is my name too!

We always hear people shout when we go outside.

Itre goes Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way — tra-la-la-la-la-la!

The Hunter x Hunter Version of “Ants Go Marching”

Image: Madhouse/Viz Media

Chimera Ants marche one at a time, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche one at a time, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants move one after another.

They are very fond of killing for entertainment.

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants move two-by-2, Hurrah, Hurrah

Chimera Ants move two-by-2, Hurrah, Hurrah

Chimera Ants marche two by two

The cat one’s name is Neferpitou

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants move three by three, Hurrah, Hurrah

Chimera Ants move three by three, Hurrah, Hurrah

Chimera Ants move three by three

Sometimes, the buff goes to Youpi.

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche four by four, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche four by four, Hurrah!

The Ants move four-by-four.

Oh my God, there’s so much gore

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche five to five, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche five to five, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche five to five

You will be able to get out alive.

All of them march down to the Selection

To conquer the world, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche six to six, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche six to six, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants move six-by-six

Ah, Nen tricks!

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche seven by seven, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche seven by seven, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche seven-by-7

Good golly it’s a whole procession

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche eight by eight, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants march 8 by 8, hurrah, and hurrah

Chimera Ants marche eight by eight

Is the King really just having a little fun?

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche nine-by-9, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche nine-by-9, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche nine to nine

The time seems to be almost up

All of them march down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Chimera Ants marche 10 by 10, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants marche 10 by 10, Hurrah!

Chimera Ants march 10 to 10.

They meet their untimely demise

And they’re no longer marching down to the Selection

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The MCU version of “My Darling Clementine”

Oh my darling, oh my darling

Oh my darling, Tony Stark

Forever lost, you are gone

Dreadful sorry, Tony Stark

A final battle is the last battle in a war.

Confronting dark armies

All of us were saved by the Avengers

Tony Stark is the inspiration

He stood firm, he was strong

Together with his super friends

Gods and aliens as well as some strange humans

They are all ready to fulfill their goals

Oh my darling, oh my darling

Oh my darling, Tony Stark

Forever lost, you are gone

Dreadful sorrow, Tony Stark

All the heroes who fought Thanos

Their power is big and powerful

They were surrounded by the powerful Thanos

They were just about to prove him incorrect

Thanos the great Thanos

He was sure he could snap!

Tony won the battle

They were brought back by his fingers.

Now he’s gone, darling Tony

With a hero’s sacrifice

His memory is fondly held in our hearts.

He paid the highest price, however.

It Steven Universe version of “Down by the Bay”

Cartoon Network Image

Beach City, Down

Where watermelon Stevens can be found

Retour to my house

Ich wage es nicht zu gehen

Because if you do

“My mother will tell me.”

“Did you ever you ever see a Pearl

With a crush on a girl?”

Beach City, Down

Beach City, Down

Where watermelon Stevens can be found

Retour to my house

Ich wage es nicht zu gehen

Because if you do

“My mother will tell me.”

“Did you ever you ever see a Garnet

That was a relationship incarnate?”

Beach City, Down

Beach City, Down

Watermelon Stevens grows where?

Retour to my house

Ich wage es nicht zu gehen

Because if you do

“My mother will tell me.”

“Did you ever you ever see a Amethyst

Ready to battle with fists?”

Beach City, Down