Elden Ring enemies ranked, according to how tasty they look to eat

You can only make and eat food in the Lands Between. These are often made with herbs that you gather along your travels. I make raisins frequently for Torrent, my faithful horse. There are many types of meat loot that can be made into delicious snacks. Slaying a deer or sheep might give you a “Sliver of Meat” — combine it with crab eggs (among other items) to get “Invigorating Cured Meat.” Yum! It is possible to eat this meat, just like in many other games. Elden RingFriends are a natural part of life.

Naturally, I’ve gone around slaying creatures, with an eye for crafting consumables — since these are helpful in a fight. But it has also made me think: “Hm, I wonder which of these creatures would be worth a little nibble?” The Lands Between are clearly filled with dangerous delicacies, and if I lived there, which ones would strike my fancy? They may not come with their own aromatics (see: Pokémon’s FarFetch’d, who wields a giant leek), but they certainly open a window of possibilities.

These possibilities have been explored by our staff, as well as others. Elden Ring’s vast map. Here are the enemies we’d like to eat. (And vegetarians and vegans, please feel free to navigate away from our carnivorous tastes — Elden RingAlso, it is brimming over with fresh herbs.

The giant crab and the smaller versions are also available.

The mildest, tenderest meat is typically found in the claw — which is, incidentally, the part of the Elden RingIt is crab I know the best. The crab likes to thrash its giant claw at me, and as such I know there’s a lot of good stuff in there. –Nicole Clark

Buy land

It’s not hard to imagine land squirts looking a lot like the egg-shaped original. Alien. There is one thought that springs to my mind when I think of these eggs: spaghetti. Is it possible to make a delicious land squirt? It is not. You can’t. Elden RingTastes better than Tupperware of cheese from the cottage that’s been sitting in the sun for one month. The land squirt, at the very least, will bring back memories of delicious pasta meals my astrologer never got to enjoy. –Chris Plante

It is the birds that have knives as legs

It’s a meal that comes with its own utensils! They are also very annoying, and victory wouldn’t taste as good (and more gamey) without them. –Pete Volk

Image via Polygon: FromSoftware/Bandai Namco

Jellyfish

Although I wouldn’t eat my summons (the horror), there are many enemy jellyfish that could be used in cold salads. –NC

Crystal snail

When I first encountered These are slimy geodes, I instantly thought about prying them out of their shells with a colossal fork and sautéing them in butter. I just can’t help but feel like once you get through that hard shell, be it glintstone or a giant skull, the snail meat will be chewy and earthy and so satiating. I haven’t enjoyed snail either of the times I’ve eaten it in real life, so I don’t know what has convinced me theseI would find it gratifying. Maybe I’ve been reading too much Dungeon is deliciousOr spent too much time trapped in dark tunnels Elden Ring. Either way, I’m going to crack those crystals open and slurp one of these snails up like a thick saucy udon noodle. –Jenna Stoeber

Octopus land octopus

My new attitudes towards eating Octopus have been influenced by the increasing cultural awareness about how smart octopides are. But the Land Octopus is a cranky, tangled mass of tentacles that doesn’t seem as clever as its underwater cousins, considering how it keeps running into my greatsword. Is there anything better than grilling one of the big tentacles and then covering it in butter. Doing it guilt-free, that’s what. –Chelsea Stark

[Ed. Note: The following is a spoiler for late-game Elden Ring.]

Image via Polygon: FromSoftware

Elden Beast

Feed me Elden Beast! The game’s final boss looks like a combination of an eel, a dinosaur, and all the stars in the universe. After I killed the boss, I would cut off a portion and eat it whole. This would lead me to either being a God or death instantly. But it would still be worthwhile. –Austen Goslin