Watch a journalist eat a shoe because of Top Gun 2

In 2010, then-culture journalist Matt Patches wrote a benign tweet: “If Top Gun 2 happens, I will eat a shoe.” In hindsight, he should have considered that dumb things said on the internet will haunt you forever. The tweet got traction and friends, peers, followers, and Paramount’s publicists spent the past decade and change converting this dash of social media snark into a binding agreement.

For a while, Patches’ tummy appeared to be pardoned. Development delays, the tragic passing of director Tony Scott, and the rise of superhero films, along with Cruise’s fluctuating public perception, suggested Top Gun 2It would not be possible to move forward. Paramount originally scheduled the film to be released in summer 2019. However, the premiere was moved to 2020 to allow for more shooting. Next came the pandemic.

Twelve years later, it all started against all odds. Maverick is the Top GunThe film is currently playing in theaters across the globe. Patches can be seen eating a shoe via YouTube.

Patches was a participant in this decade of change and growth. After working in media outlets such as Hollywood.com and Esquire, Patches eventually joined Polygon Entertainment, which is the most popular entertainment magazine on the planet. As our entertainment deputy editor, he prevents editors and writers alike from agreeing not to eat clothes in exchange for top-selling tentpole products. Patches also got married and had two children, which is why he can’t just eat any normal shoe.

In the words of his wife: “No. Get out of here. Your feet aren’t on the floor. You can’t die right now.” As someone who relies on Patches on daily basis, I have to agree. Yet, Patches still managed to find a way for him to make and eat usable shoes. His talent is amazing.

Most folks won’t be able to feast on Tom Cruise’s latest cinematic death wish until this weekend, so I recommend Patches’ shoe video as an appetizer, something to really whet your appetite.

Patches is on parental leave at the moment, however I reached out to him for clarification:

“I remain skeptical that even if Top Gun 2Does well. Top Gun 3 will happen — doesn’t feel possible. But I won’t be eating anything if it does. This video should serve as an example of how we all can make mistakes online. Also, there’s still room to be dumb online.”